Загадки на новый год на английском (40 щтук)

What kind of ball doesn’t bounce?

Ответ

(A snowball!)

What do snowmen eat for breakfast?

Ответ

(Snowflakes)

How do snowmen travel around?

Ответ

(By iceicle!)

What kind of bird can write?

Ответ

(A PENguine)

How do you call an eskimo cow?

Ответ

(Eskimoo!)


What is Snowmen in May?

Ответ

(A puddle!)

What kind of candle burns longer, a red candle or a green candle?

Ответ

(Neither! Candles always burn shorter!)

What’s the best thing to give your parents for Cristmas?

Ответ

(A list of everything you want!)

What do elves learn in school?

Ответ

[The Elf-abet!]

What was so good about the neurotic doll the girl was given for Christmas?

Ответ

[It was already wound up.]

Did you hear that one of Santa’s reindeer now works for Proctor and Gambel?

Ответ

[Its true, Comet cleans sinks!]

How many reindeer does Santa Have???

Ответ

(named below)

Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen
Rudoph

Ответ

(the one with the red nose)

Mom, can I have a dog for Christmas?

Ответ

[No, you can have turkey like everyone else.]

What nationality is Santa Claus?

Ответ

[North Polish.]

What do you call a cat on the beach at Christmastime?

Ответ

[Sandy Claws!]

What kind of bird can write?

Ответ

[A PENguin.]

Why did Santa spell Christmas N-O-E?

Ответ

[Because the angel had said,»No L!»]

Who is never hungry at Christmas?

Ответ

[The turkey, he is always stuffed.]

What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?

Ответ

[Claustrophobic.]

Judge: «What are you charged with?»
Prisoner: «Doing my Christmas shopping early.»
Judge: «That’s not an offense. How early were you doing this shopping?»
Prisoner: «Before the store opened.»
What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a detective ?

Ответ

[Santa Clues!]

A woman went to the Post Office to buy stamps for her Christmas cards. Clerk: «What denomination?»
Woman: «Oh, good heavens! Have we come to this? Well, give me 50 Baptist and 50 Catholic.»
What do monkeys sing at Christmas?

Ответ

[Jungle bells, jungle bells…]

What do you do if Santa gets stuck in your chimney?

Ответ

[Pour Santa flush on him.]

What do snowmen eat for breakfast?

Ответ

[Snowflakes.]

Q: What does Father Christmas write on his cards at Christmas?
A: ABCDEFGHIJKMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ (no-L)
What’s the best thing to put into a Christmas cake?

Ответ

[Your teeth.]

Why does Santa’s sled get such good mileage?
[Because it has long-distance runners on each side.]
What are Christmas trees like bad knitters?

Ответ

[They both drop their needles.]

Why does Scrooge love Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer?
[because every buck is dear to him.]
How do sheep in Mexico say Merry Christmas?

Ответ

[Fleece Navidad!]

What do you get if you deep fry Santa Claus?

Ответ

[Crisp Cringle.]

Knock Knock
Who’s there ?
Avery
Avery who ?
Avery merry Christmas !
Why is Christmas just like a day at the office ?

Ответ

[You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.]

What do you get if you cross an apple with a Christmas Tree?

Ответ

[A pineapple.]

What did the guest sing at the Eskimo Christmas Party?

Ответ

[Freeze a jolly good fellow…]

What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?

Ответ

[It’s Christmas, Eve!]

What did the ghosts say to Santa Claus?

Ответ

[We’ll have a boo Christmas without you.]

What did Santa shout to his toys on Christmas Eve?

Ответ

[Okay everyone, sack time!!]

If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get?

Ответ

[Missletoe!]

If Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus had a child, what would he be called?

Ответ

[A subordinate claus.]

Just before Christmas, there was an honest politician, a kind lawyer and Santa
Claus travelling in a lift of a very posh hotel. Just before the doors opened
they all noticed a $5 bill lying on the floor. Which one picked it up??

Ответ

[Santa of course, the other two don’t exist!]

What do you have in December that you don’t have in any other month?

Ответ

[The letter «D»!]

Why does Santa have 3 gardens?

Ответ

[So he can ho-ho-ho.]

Why was Santa’s little helper depressed?

Ответ

[Because he had low elf esteem.]

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Ответ

[Frostbite.]

Knock Knock
Who’s there ?
Holly
Holly who ?
Holly-days are here again !
What do you get when you cross an archer with a gift-wrapper?

Ответ

[Ribbon hood.]

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